I’m going to claim this as a result of my age, but I realised today that Heidi has been 13 for rather a long time and after some quiet pondering appreciated that it’s more than a year since I heard that she was this age.
From today, Heidi is officially 14! It’s a weird emotional leap for me but to her it’s just another day. I have never kept company with a fourteen year old dog let alone one who’s been given such a wonderful extension to her expected span. Why do we get hang-ups about age? I verged on a crisis at 30 thinking my life hadn’t gone to plan as I’d not had children yet. At 40 there was the quiet acceptance that this was something not meant to be. 46 came with the revelation that actually I was now sharing my life with 3 teenage boys – regardless of the number of days each week it is still a joyous event. It was almost certainly a blessing that I didn’t have babies – I’m rubbish on disturbed sleep!
Living within each moment as a gift & keeping eyes wide open you see so much more than living waiting for something to arrive. If you are in the habit of looking forward to an event or thinking that happiness can’t happen until something else does, when the moment arrives that it DOES happen you’ll almost certainly miss it because you are in the habit of looking forward as opposed to looking at or being with.
The early days with Heidi taught me to be very much in the moment. It was pointless looking ahead as I had no concept of what ahead may be. I would have been astounded if anyone had told me categorically that she would be as strong and healthy as she is now, and maybe disbelieving. But, here we are with her tucked up behind me snoring gently just waiting for my return to the sofa so that she can hop up beside me to rest her head on my lap, waggle her eyebrows at me and nudge my hand onto her head for tickles.
Her age is remarkable. Her will to live is remarkable. The people who have helped her to this point are remarkable & have my eternal gratitude. Heidi is fourteen from today.
Blessed be.
R x